December 1, 2025
“Positive thinking is not about expecting the best to happen — it's about accepting that whatever happens is the best for now.” Many of you may have heard that it doesn’t matter whether your blood group is A positive or O positive — in life, you must always be B positive. Also, being grateful for every little thing matters. Shift your attention from your problems to your blessings and feel your negativity melt away. You may have also heard quotes like, “It’s not about what happens to you on the outside; it’s about how you deal with it on the inside that changes you positively.”
Being grateful and positive during difficult and troubling times is indeed uplifting and very important. But it is equally important to ensure that positivity does not become toxic.
Toxic positivity means believing that it doesn’t matter what happens to you at all — you must feel positive regardless of how you truly feel. It is an imposition forced by oneself and others. I am not feeling positive; I am in pain, yet somehow I have to drag my mind and pressure myself to think, “I need to see something positive in this situation. I need to see something good in what’s happening.” It denies pain and negative feelings, and it denies the fact that I am just a human being. Such artificial positivity can be extremely harmful to our mental health because it doesn’t allow us to feel or process our real emotions. Instead, it attempts to defend those emotions with layers of intellectual reasoning or false hope.
For example, you may have lost your job and feel anxious, depressed, and worried about the future — but toxic positivity is someone, or even you yourself, saying, “Be grateful that you are living.” We can be extremely grateful for all that we have, but gratitude alone does not take away the pain we may be going through right now because of losing a job.
Real positivity is acknowledging pain and negative feelings while continuing to look at your blessings. It’s alright to feel not alright — at least in the moment. Real positivity allows time for feelings to settle and for the heart to heal.
So, the next time you are feeling low, beware of pushy advisers who burden you with positivity without being sensitive to your emotional state. Look for empathetic supporters — people who lend their ears to listen to your feelings without judging you, and who offer help in times of distress. Don’t allow your feelings to pile up in your mind. Write them down; practice journaling. Let the negative energy flow out of your mind and onto paper. And if it becomes beyond your capacity to handle, please make sure to seek professional help.
Because positivity is incredibly amazing — just make sure it is not toxic. “You cannot control the world, but you can control the way you think about it.” Happiness begins with a positive mindset, not a perfect life.