What do I Learn When I Visit a Cemetery?

  •   Mon, Nov 24 2025
  •   By Fr Ajay Nelson D'Silva SJ

November 24, 2025

There are places in life where no preacher, teacher, or philosopher can speak louder than the place itself. The teaching of the hospital is that health is a value and that the prison is teaching that freedom is a precious thing. But the cemetery is the place where one learns the truth about life itself. The silence of the cemetery makes it one of the best spiritual classrooms the soul can have. Each time I cross the gates of the cemetery, it is as if time has stopped, the noise has disappeared, and life has shown me its deepest teachings. 

1. The Cemetery Teaches Me to See Life Clearly 

In the busy pace of my life, everything looks important—cheers, possessions, positions, power.  But in the graveyard all these delusions go away. The tombs remind me that a large part of my anxiety today will be insignificant tomorrow. The essentials get so clear out of the blue: faith, family ties, ethics, kindness, and the condition of my spirit. 

2. The Cemetery Teaches Me Gratitude for Each Breath 

The same message is whispered by every tombstone: Life is a gift and not a right.

Some have lived for many years and some for just a few days—but still all lives, long or short, were equally precious. The feeling of thankfulness transforms into not just a feeling but also a manner of living—thankful for my health, for my family, for forgiving, and for the opportunity of starting over again. 

3. The Cemetery Teaches Me That Love Is the Only Currency That Lasts 

The most common messages found on the gravestones are those of love—dear father, beloved mother, faithful friend, and so on. I have hardly ever seen any inscriptions that read: He possessed three properties. She had a huge bank balance. He had many followers on social media. These are all not our legacies to proclaim in the after life.  Only the love we received, the kindness we gave, and the forgiveness we granted are left to count. 

4. The Cemetery Teaches Me Humility and Simplicity 

Whereas the outside world teaches competition with its cut-throat nature, the cemetery is a place for surrender. Here, no one’s position, no one’s qualities, and no one’s education count above others. The lord and the beggar have now become neighbours in their graves due to death conquering both of them equally. This mute equality is a humbling experience for me. 

5. The Cemetery Teaches Me to Put My Life in Order 

Asking from me a rather uncomfortable question, every single grave says: “If you were to die today, what was left undone that you are going to leave?”  Apologies that were never spoken. Issues with people that were never solved. Promises that were never fulfilled. Talents that were never developed. Peace with God that was never created.  The cemetery is not a place of fear—it is a place of conversion. 

6. The Cemetery Communicates to Me the Message that My Real Home Is Far Away 

The cemetery speaks that I am a wanderer while the world beckons me to erect everlasting constructions. Life is not the goal; it is the adventure. The tomb is not the stop; it is the entry. The cemetery instructs me to exist with one foot on the planet and the other in paradise. 

Conclusion: The Cemetery Stirs the Living Up 

Not just a place of grief, the cemetery is more a realm of the wise, the truthful and softly awakened. It is always reminding me of the shortness of life, but also the beauty that can be found in it. The inevitability of death is certain, but hostility towards it need not be the case. The reality of eternity is a matter of fact, and it is a reality full of hope. 

Note: The Catholics remember our deceased on the 2nd of November of each year through special prayers for the dead as well as visiting the graves in the cemetery.

 

 
By Fr Ajay Nelson D'Silva SJ
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