Are you into an Intellectually Compatible Relationship?

December 21, 2021

The success or failure of a relationship depends on several factors. Intellectual compatibility is one such essential factor according to relationship experts. It can make the relationship long lasting and more exciting for both the partners. When you are intellectually compatible, you’ll have similar levels of vocabulary, knowledge on certain subjects you can converse about without getting bored.

What does it mean to be intellectually compatible?

If you are able to talk about everything openly, could debate respectfully and have a pleasant feeling then you are compatible and have the same chemistry. If texting or talking on the phone or sharing links is exciting then that is what you want in a relationship. You should be compatible not only emotionally and physically but also intellectually. For a fulfilling relationship, we need to hold intellectual and stimulating conversations. If someone gets excited talking about their work and the other person gazes off into the distance without care, there is no intellectual compatibility.

Intellectual compatibility has more than one dimension. We can accept it up to a certain point, sharing vocabulary concepts and perspective can make it easier to have meaningful conversation. It means you and your partner share similar views on what you consider interesting or mentally stimulating.

When two people are intellectually connected, there is no hesitation in sharing their thoughts and ideas even when their opinions differ. They know each other from inside, much deeper than anyone else does. This doesn’t necessarily mean you both need to have a high IQ level. It simply means that you both have the capacity to indulge in deeper conversations that become mutually interesting for the two of you.

What if you are intellectually incompatible?

Intellectual compatibility matters in a relationship, though it is not entirely essential. Many relationships with mismatched personalities also lead a happy life together. People could be attracted to each other yet at different levels when it comes to intellect. Its compatibility that’s what makes a difference when it comes to various areas of relationship like social, behavioral or emotional.

Some people rely more heavily on intellect and logic, while some are driven more strongly by their feelings and emotions. If you approach someone who is driven by feelings and speak about nurturing, surrendering and love that will appeal to them greatly. But if you speak the same to an intellectually driven person, they may not be able to understand love and surrender because they are driven by intellect and knowledge rather than feelings. They perceive everything through the lens of knowledge.

If you know there is an intellectual difference in your relationship, always remember that you can’t force your partner to change who they are. You can, however, find other ways to strengthen your relationship by looking for mutual interest and other facets of life that you enjoy together. This can cement the relationship.


If you and your partner are intellectually incompatible, does that mean your relationship won't workout long-term? Not necessarily. Every couple has their differences. What you do with those differences will determine whether or not your relationship will be successful.




By Vinet D'Souza
To submit your article / poem / short story to Daijiworld, please email it to mentioning 'Article/poem submission for daijiworld' in the subject line. Please note the following:

  • The article / poem / short story should be original and previously unpublished in other websites except in the personal blog of the author. We will cross-check the originality of the article, and if found to be copied from another source in whole or in parts without appropriate acknowledgment, the submission will be rejected.
  • The author of the poem / article / short story should include a brief self-introduction limited to 500 characters and his/her recent picture (optional). Pictures relevant to the article may also be sent (optional), provided they are not bound by copyright. Travelogues should be sent along with relevant pictures not sourced from the Internet. Travelogues without relevant pictures will be rejected.
  • In case of a short story / article, the write-up should be at least one-and-a-half pages in word document in Times New Roman font 12 (or, about 700-800 words). Contributors are requested to keep their write-ups limited to a maximum of four pages. Longer write-ups may be sent in parts to publish in installments. Each installment should be sent within a week of the previous installment. A single poem sent for publication should be at least 3/4th of a page in length. Multiple short poems may be submitted for single publication.
  • All submissions should be in Microsoft Word format or text file. Pictures should not be larger than 1000 pixels in width, and of good resolution. Pictures should be attached separately in the mail and may be numbered if the author wants them to be placed in order.
  • Submission of the article / poem / short story does not automatically entail that it would be published. Daijiworld editors will examine each submission and decide on its acceptance/rejection purely based on merit.
  • Daijiworld reserves the right to edit the submission if necessary for grammar and spelling, without compromising on the author's tone and message.
  • Daijiworld reserves the right to reject submissions without prior notice. Mails/calls on the status of the submission will not be entertained. Contributors are requested to be patient.
  • The article / poem / short story should not be targeted directly or indirectly at any individual/group/community. Daijiworld will not assume responsibility for factual errors in the submission.
  • Once accepted, the article / poem / short story will be published as and when we have space. Publication may take up to four weeks from the date of submission of the write-up, depending on the number of submissions we receive. No author will be published twice in succession or twice within a fortnight.
  • Time-bound articles (example, on Mother's Day) should be sent at least a week in advance. Please specify the occasion as well as the date on which you would like it published while sending the write-up.

Comment on this article

  • Winston Almeida, Udupi/Abu Dhabi

    Thu, Dec 23 2021

    A well-written article by Vinet ........... quite insightful and informative. Most of us overlook this aspect when we get into a relationship.

Leave a Comment

Title: Are you into an Intellectually Compatible Relationship?

You have 2000 characters left.


Please write your correct name and email address. Kindly do not post any personal, abusive, defamatory, infringing, obscene, indecent, discriminatory or unlawful or similar comments. will not be responsible for any defamatory message posted under this article.

Please note that sending false messages to insult, defame, intimidate, mislead or deceive people or to intentionally cause public disorder is punishable under law. It is obligatory on Daijiworld to provide the IP address and other details of senders of such comments, to the authority concerned upon request.

Hence, sending offensive comments using daijiworld will be purely at your own risk, and in no way will be held responsible.