Exam Fever: Going Beyond Titles

March 27, 2014

When you read this article I believe it is the examination time in India (or may be over) and all are anxiously waiting for the results of SSLC and PUC. May be somewhere many big dreams are to crash and many expectations are to fall. Along with that tragedy may strike suddenly from nowhere. I was in India in February 2nd week and I read 6 suicide cases in a short period of 9 days in Mangalore and Udupi!! These suicides are the direct results of, from fear of facing the examination; to getting low marks. Age group varied from 16 years to 20 years. Really an alarming situation. Considering the fact that those exams in February were may be class exams as well as preparatory exams for SSLC, I am sure going by the trend, April / May months, are going to witness many more similar situations when the actual results come out.

The pressure in the field of education to perform has gone up drastically. At the same time there is hardly any change in approach in study methods or techniques. Add to this imbalance, we have this parental false prestige(we want to be noticed by others), media glorification of the talent and lack of knowledge about the other plenty of good possibilities beyond engineering and medical degrees. This is what driving us to depression and tragic ends. We are relying on our memory more than learning with logic or curiosity. Everyone wants to become an Engineer or a Doctor. Nothing less than that. I also read about in that week of February month, some programmes giving lessons on radio to SSLC students and some lectures about examinations, which leads to more confusion, fear and chaos (This should have been done in the beginning of the year where a student gets enough time to practice and adjust to a new technique, if any, not at the fag end).

Kindly observe carefully what is happening around us. Today’s modern world gives everything that an Engineering or a Medical degree brings, provided you perform well in the chosen domain. It need not be just these two titles. Just a bachelor degree in these two streams is not going to give you stars from the skies. There is quality education, recognition and life beyond these two titles.

Kindly note that there is no difference in a student who gets 85% and 100 %; hardly any difference in their IQ levels. Then where is the problem? Problem lies in the environment and enlightenment provided at home. So before putting your child under pressure to perform, look at yourself first, what you have given your child to perform. Parents responsibility doesn’t ends by just sending them good school. In fact it is the environment at home that makes or breaks .Have you ever noticed why a doctors child will enter medical field, an engineers to engineering, a politicians will become a politician, an actors into acting etc etc? It is because they model their parents, they are the product of their environment. A child / student don’t just go by your advice, but they see what actually you do and follow that. That less percentage of marks is just for that day only and pertaining to that set of question paper. It’s not universal. May be if there is one more exam on the same subject, the very next day I am sure, ranking / percentage positions of the students will not remain the same (like the best of 3 games in final; in cricket).
Take care of your child. Don’t push them to end their lives. Look at the balloon, it looks beautiful until it can contain a certain amount of pressure, beyond that it bursts and the purpose is lost. That's how your child is. When you are in confusion / lost, remember the laws of nature. You will get the answer as well as inspiration. Life always gives many more opportunities. So wait for your turn. Look around us , we will find plenty of people living happily, earning big money, in many cases much more than a doctor or engineer earns and have good social standing without the label of degrees In case your child gets low percentage nothing is lost, take this small failure (If it as a failure) as a feedback. It is not the end.

Spread this awareness around you. Look at who is depressed and thinking negatively and dangerously about the results. Report to their parents first or to a counselor or give them the positive feedback and put them back on the right track. Save lives, they are precious. Whatever be the nature of the problem, there can’t be a valid reason for self destruction.

If your child is in SSLC / PUC, start talking to them from today itself. Make them feel easy and show your concern to them and convey them that whatever be the results you love them and need them. If any assistance is needed you may mail me to insightvivi24@yahoo.com.



By Vincent D'Sa
Vincent D'Sa is from Pangala parish (Shankerpura), Udupi dist, currently residing in Muscat, Oman. He is an NLP Master Trainer, counselor and corporate trainer, and runs a training and counseling center for Mangalorean students in Muscat to achieve academic excellence through NLP Techniques.
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Comment on this article

  • Manesh Menezes, Bahrain

    Mon, May 12 2014

    Nice article, all the best !

  • Shrawan Kumar, New Delhi

    Thu, Apr 24 2014

    Dear Vincent,
    Wonderful piece of article,Thank you for sharing this with us. I can relate with what you are saying. I got several queries during my trainings or workshops from students in schools, they sound as if the result is already d and they are fighting to cope with the d result. And this put them into immense pressure, as they been fed, securing good marks is the foundation of great career which obviously been told is engg/medical. My younger brother appeared three years consecutively in medical entrance exams but couldn't make out eventually. Then our parents decided to let him free to decide the stream other than medical and he chosed BSc. Agri.. and is doing well....

  • Samuel Martis, Mumbai

    Sat, Apr 12 2014

    Vincy.. liked your article!!.. Keep it up Vincy!

  • Michael Roshan, Urwastores

    Wed, Apr 02 2014

    Good article, every parent should read this, keep writing such articles

  • savita vincent dsa, mangalore

    Tue, Apr 01 2014

    Dear vincy. Exams are on everywhere.. Students along with parents are stressed.a lot of expectation and competitive world. Your article is a must for all parents...parents must spend quality time with their children......this will release quite a lot of their stress... Stress on this issue in your next article...keep writing such good articles which will help students as well as parents......

  • Rudolf Rodrigues, Mumbai

    Tue, Apr 01 2014

    Thanks Vincent bro for this concise article sending a very wise message to parents, parenting teenagers on the threshold of their educational careers!!

    The days of success by doing engg. and medicine are gone, as you have said there are umpteen fields depending on the passion of the child where he can excel and get both fame and money and live a well contented life!!

    The approach of educating children should be a holistic one not only emphasizing and pressuring to score on the academic front only so that the product which comes out is able to face the tough world and make a place for himself without much difficulty!!

    I end with this famous quote of Einstein: “Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid.”

  • Philomena, Mangalore

    Tue, Apr 01 2014

    How true it is for parents to realize the limitation of their own child. It is the foremost duty of parents not to make the student's life miserable and lose hope for life. Truly it is right time to mend parents' attitude........

  • Ronak Dsa, ladyhill

    Tue, Apr 01 2014

    Dear dada....nice article..... Wish you wer wd me giving me support during my exams. Miss u dada.... Both father and mother need to play an equal role in their child's development and growth.....

  • vidya dsouza, mangalore/scotland

    Tue, Apr 01 2014

    dear vincent dsa very beautifully you have written this. i wish all parents read this.

  • VALERIAN ALVA, Dubai/padu belle

    Mon, Mar 31 2014

    Good article Vincy,reality in the society.Nice to hear that you are helping the needy students through NLP techniques. GOD bless you.

  • savita dsa nee rasquinha, ladyhill

    Mon, Mar 31 2014

    Thanks vincy for the lovely article....good. Keep it up . keep writing such articles and help us all overcome exam stresses...................

  • Ignatus Rodrigues, Uppoor/Abu Dhabi

    Mon, Mar 31 2014

    A good and relevant article. Thanks Vincent. You are doing a great job. God Bless you and your work. I have a small reservation about the mention on big money. My view is that money is secondary, pursue what interests you more and be passionate about it and work hard towards making it successful be it becoming a mechanic or a fashion designer. You will eventually succeed and you will be able to earn your daily bread. What is important is you need to be educated and for this percentage does not matter at all. Parents need to give their children freedom and encourage them to create their own space and I am sure our children will not let us down.

  • Clevin DSouza, Pangla/Dubai

    Mon, Mar 31 2014

    Very good article at the appropriate time. Exams are going on...all are stressed, including parents, teachers....Nice one Vincy...Help many more students to take the exam as well as life easily...

  • John Gonsalves, Barkur / Muscat

    Mon, Mar 31 2014

    Nice article Mr. Vincent. You are absolutely right, there are many other fields other than engineering and medicine, which are more lucrative and will lead to respectable positions. We can see in most of the organizations, many people on top positions who are from Commerce or arts background. However important for students to know is to take it seriously, do your best to your potential and try to excel in it, no matter which field it is. Good luck..

  • Stany Jovin Menezes, Pangla / Oman

    Sun, Mar 30 2014

    Good Article Vincy. Keep writing.

  • shwetha, mangalore

    Sun, Mar 30 2014

    must read n followed by evry parent

  • Flavia Menezes, Shankerpura

    Sat, Mar 29 2014

    Good article. Keep writing.

  • R.Bhandarkar, M'lore

    Sat, Mar 29 2014

    Must read for parents who pressurize their children unnecessarily and also fight in front of them calling each other names.

  • Linet Noronha, Mumbai

    Fri, Mar 28 2014

    Nice article Vincy..keep it up..very inspiring article to parents as well as children...Good ..keep writing..

  • John DSouza, Mangalore

    Fri, Mar 28 2014

    Going beyond titles is a good suggestion, solution and choice
    Rising unemployment is a serious concern, irrespective of titles
    Rapidly multiplying academics is the unavoidable cause of crisis
    Widening gap between have and have not is in uncontrollable mode
    Mobile technology and automobile sector run in two opposite directions
    A couple of bulls move in different speed and energy to hinder the smooth travel
    The serious need is the job creation, to handle the rising flow of job seekers

    Think different and support, to implement the change, to face the adverse situation
    We ignore the massive dead weight on wheels which we carry with care like infants
    Since no investment with no reward, why we carry and move the weight as huge burden?
    Why not we can pull and roll on the millions of tons weight of commuters and goods?
    While the gravity is free and 24/7, why we spend on fuel to suffer pollutions and costs?
    Identifying severe problems, targeting solutions and enjoying benefits is the contentment
    Let us save energy and funds to have rapid development and growth, with timely action

  • Lorna, Thottam/miraroad

    Fri, Mar 28 2014

    Good Article, keep writing.

  • Priyanka Dsouza, Pangla/Muscat

    Thu, Mar 27 2014

    Good write up uncle Vincy. Keep writing. Looking forward for more inspiring articles.

  • Reginald, Dubai

    Thu, Mar 27 2014

    Good Article Vincy. Now a days parents are pressurizing their children to get a high percentage of marks by comparing the one who gets first or second in the school without identifying the IQ level of their child. Survey says that a lot of engineers are jobless after getting good marks & experience because of short of opportunities. Plenty of other fields with diversified job opportunities & self employment possibilities left unidentified with the hope of making their child engineer. We should see our child's interest in the Area where he wants to grow & pursue him to study.

  • Shobha Kotian, Mangalore

    Thu, Mar 27 2014

    A wonderful article, Mr.Vincent D'sa. Thank you for enlightening parents like us. Truly said, there are a wide range of fields to be chosen for the present generation, while pressurizing them to be either a Doctor or an Engineer is a very selfish instinct. All children are born with varying and unique talent, we need to encourage them to nurture that talent....

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