Dr Ananth Prabhu G
Mangaluru, May 11, 2017
"Just when I started enjoying my vacation, it hit me that the exam results were on the horizon. All my happiness was gone and all I could feel was anxiety about the exam results.
"This is one of the most common feelings which most of us have gone through. Sadly, many students who have recently given their Class X, XII exams must be going through it now, because their results will be announced in any moment from now.
It's a nightmare having to wait for exam results, especially if you aren't sure if you've done well. If you're stressed out after taking your exams, don't worry! There are steps you can take to calm down, reduce your stress, and get on with your life.
Take some deep breaths. Stress and anxiety triggers your body’s “fight or flight” response,
flooding your body with adrenaline and making your breaths shallow and rapid. Fight this stress response by taking some calming deep breaths. Put one hand on your chest and the other on your abdomen, below your ribcage. As you inhale, you should feel your abdomen expand along with your chest.
Inhale slowly through your nose. Try to inhale for a count of 4.
Hold the breath for 1-2 seconds. Release the breath slowly through your mouth.
Repeat this process 6-10 times per minute for ten minutes.
Alright, now that you are a bit more relaxed than how you were initially while reading this article, let’s get started. We all try very hard to make something come true, to achieve something for ourselves and for others. Exams are one such step towards our achievement. It is a test of fire. Passing or failing these exams makes us feel positive or negative about ourselves. It affects our confidence. Most of us also worry about how others, especially family and close ones, might react to our results. A good exam result has become something to brag about to our friends and relatives, Oh yes, to update the status on Whatsapp and Facebook as well. We live in the age of Social Media and everything we do has to come online, isn’t it? Whereas, A bad result is seen as the end of our academic careers.
Imagine you are playing a cricket match, you are batting. There are no wickets behind you. This is a game of life. Not the game of cricket. No wicket keeper behind you. No fielders around in the ground. Only life is in front of you. Life will keep throwing balls at you. The first ball comes to you. You try to hit the ball. You miss, the ball goes behind you. What will you do now? Suicide? Remember, no wickets. You are not out.
Alright, now imagine you are a parent. Your son/daughter missed a ball. What will you tell them- That they are losers? That they can do nothing, they are good for nothing?
What is life? Think about it for once. It is not what you think and what you can imagine. It is much beyond that that. Life cannot end by one event.
Alright back to the game of cricket. The ball that life threw at you was only an opportunity. This opportunity comes to you in the form of numbers, in the form of marks, in the form of exams. It may be 10th exam, 12th exam. I am not denying that the ball that came to you was not an opportunity.
Yes it was. Of course, if you were capable to hit a six or four (good marks), you will definitely get a good college. But the point I want to make here is, so what if you miss the ball? Opportunities Might be big or small, what seems small to you might be a big opportunity or vice versa Absolutely nothing is going to happen if you miss a ball, because even if you want to, even if anyone wants to, no one can get you out in this world. Because in this game of cricket, there are no wickets or fielders for you to get out. But, the only way you can get out is, you leave the stadium and go, until then, no exam, no marks, no parents, no relatives, no teachers can get you out. You are born to win. If not this ball, next ball.
If not the next one, the next one after that.
No power in this universe can get you out. Remember, 1000’s of balls life will throw to you. Some small balls, some big balls. You will keep getting many, at different intervals. If you miss one, don’t cry, don’t fret. Just stay focused. When there is a setback, don’t sit back. Just step back and scan for opportunities. When you find the right one, just bounce back. You may be a failure in the eyes of the society.
One event in life cannot make you or anyone a failure. You may miss the second ball. You may miss the third ball. Even the fourth ball. But the fifth ball I am sure you will hit a six. But after hitting a six, do not stop there. Wait for more balls. Till you are alive, wait for the balls the life will throw at you. And keep playing. Keep scoring runs. Stay focused. The one who works hard and keeps trying, he/she will be successful.
Here are some tips on how to make the most of your good exam results:
- If you are a believer, thank the almighty. Visit the place of worship.
- Celebrate. Take your parents/elders/teachers blessings. It is only because of their support you have achieved this feat. After that, go for a party with your friends. Celebrate responsibly.
- Be humble. Console a friend who has not got marks as expected, or who has failed.
- If you are in 10th standard, then you need to start applying for good PU Colleges. If you opt for Science, then you may consider joining a PU College that offers, JEE, NEET, NATA coaching on campus, so that you can save time going to other coaching classes and wasting time commuting and avoiding mismatch of syllabus at two places.
- If you are interested in basic sciences, then do not opt for integrated coaching. You are only wasting your time. Join a college that provides only 9-4 classes for PU.
- If you are opting for Commerce, you are advised to study CA, CS, ICWA as well, as it gives an added advantage for your career and academics. Chose the combination wisely. Avoid Basic Maths if you are not good at it.
- If Arts, then you can select the combination of your choice. Ensure you get good grades and plan your future well. If you want to get into civil services, start reading the competition success and other magazines regularly.
If you are in II PU, then
- Wait for JEE, NEET, NATA, CET results if you are aspiring for Engineering, Medicine or Architecture and other courses.
- If you are interested in Basic Sciences, then start visiting good colleges and interact with the faculty, go through the syllabus and check the placements.
- If commerce, then think of CA, CS, ICWA along with undergraduate course.
- If arts, you have plenty of options. Remember, if you are the best, you can excel in any field. We need the best professionals in the end of the day.
- So many interdisciplinary and new courses have emerged that have lots of potential. Learn more about them.
Here are some tips on how to make the most of your bad exam results:
Accept it for what it is
Was your grade simply lower than you had hoped, or did you fail to achieve a passing grade? You see, exam failure can mean different things to different people. If you at least managed to pass, try to focus on this as a positive, but even if you didn't, know that this is certainly not the end of the world.
Stop comparing yourself to others
Don't beat yourself up just because your friends managed to get better scores. We are all different and we all have different strengths. You have to keep your focus on yourself and your own goals. Your friends have their own paths to follow.
Know that you can do better next time
This is the perfect opportunity to take a serious look at your study techniques. Chances are, there are some improvements that can be made, or maybe you need to try a different study strategy all together. Whatever didn't work for you this time around can be changed up to ensure that you're better prepared for the next exam.
What doesn't kill you makes you stronger
Even the most successful people in the world have failed somewhere along the way. This is because they have not allowed their failures to define them. Learning to deal with challenges head on it the only way to ensure personal growth. It's survival of the fittest out there, and the strongest contenders are those who are always ready to come back fighting.
Consider your options
A good place to start is to talk to your teacher. If you feel like you might need some more help, find a tutor, or meet a career guidance expert. Just know that whatever the situation, you will always have options, but giving up should never be one of them.
Here are 4 more points (very important)
- How to deal with parents during bad results
How to face parents? With openness and honesty. A bad result is also an opportunity to learn and try and understand. Receiving a bad grade happens to most people at some point in their education. A bad grade can already make you feel low, even without the added stress of telling your parents. Telling your parents is necessary, however, and you shouldn’t avoid it. Parents only want what is best for you. You can handle this situation by preparing yourself, explaining the grade, accepting the punishment, and improving your grades in the future.
In my experience, most parents strive to help their child reach adulthood as a contented, rounded, healthy, loving individual who is capable of reaching their potential.
Everyone has differing levels of potential, and parents typically value high levels of effort above high levels of results. Only the child will know whether they gave their best effort in learning and preparing for the exam. If they gave their best, they can feel proud and seek additional help to improve. If they did not, it is a chance to ask themselves why not?
Parents are not your enemies. They want to see you successful in life. If your result is bad, it is going to give them disappointment and make them worried about your future.
You need to find out the reasons behind it because after all it will affect YOUR career.
- How to deal with relatives during bad results
Tell them honestly. If you lie, it can be clearly made out on your face. Therefore, without getting into too many details, tell them, not as expected, look forward to do well in future.
- How parents should deal with relatives/friends during bad results
It will be hard for the parents to face their colleagues, relatives etc because everyone will be inquisitive to know about the performance of the boy/girl. The best thing is, if anyone asks about the results, do not lie. In case if the student has failed, Tell them it is not as expected. He will write the exams again and try to score better marks.
Well, if the student has scored fewer marks, you can tell- The marks are not as expected. I hope he/she will do well in future by working harder and identifying the weak points. Keep it simple, straight and do not go into the details. If they are more inquisitive, you can tell them you are not comfortable and walk away.
How parents should deal with their kids who have scored less grades/failed
Majority of Indian Parents want their children to top the class, stand first all the time. They can't digest if someone else takes that spot. But they also forget the fact that if someone wins, others have to lose. Truly deserving candidate usually occupies that covered place. Okay, what about other students who come second, third or others who give mediocre performances in the exams or get low grades. Are they not intelligent? Can't they prosper in life? In fact, they are and they can!
So just don't worry about the low grades he/she is getting. It's said ( and we've seen ) that the average students also do well later in their life, when compared to many of the top ranked students!
Support your kid. Tell them that it's not the end of the world and that education isn't everything. Maybe your kid has other talents. Instead of scolding the kid for low grades, identify the reason behind such performance and when you come to know about it, do something to deal with it. If your kid is bad in swimming, don’t force him/her to swim. Ask them to try running/cycling/long jump etc. In other words, if the kid is bad in science, don’t force science. Arts, Commerce should be considered.
About author :
Ananth Prabhu G, 31 years old is an author, software engineer, motivational speaker, TV host and educator. BE in CS, MBA in IS, MTech in CS, Diploma in Cyber Laws, PhD in Computer Engineering. He is an Associate Professor in the Department of Computer Science and Engineering at Sahyadri College of Engineering & Management , Director of Vikas Edu Solutions and Advisor of Vikas Group of Institutions. He has authored two very popular motivational book for Students and Teachers- Little Black Book. Loves Music, Singing, Playing various Musical Instruments, Trained Tabla Player. Co-Founder of Campus Interview Training Solutions, which helps in training Final year Engineering students to make them industry ready. He has delivered more than 500 technical and management workshops. He is also the guest faculty of Cyber Crime and Cyber Law at the Karnataka Police Academy, Mysore.