July 25, 2012

Considering the ill effects of the ever-increasing population, and after long years of debate and expert opinions, people finally accepted the idea of family planning, probably not giving a second thought to their own interests.

While I myself vouch for the policy, acknowledging the restrictions of the society at large, I equally miss those good old stories, which my granny used to narrate to us. The amount of fun and pranks she enjoyed in a big family of eight siblings... of course, that is a dream impossible now.

Today, people normally tend to misinterpret. If the couples decided to go for more than two kids, or perhaps the lady is pregnant after a long gap, tongues begin to wag in no time.

 “Contraceptive must have broken!”, “Poor husband (or wife)!”, “Couldn’t they control even at their 'old' age!” and such other other remarks make the rounds. In addition, the ladies (no offence) find an interesting topic for discussion. However, hardly anyone would compliment the love factor between the husband and wife. Are we to criticise their decision?

Apparently, the pressure to avoid having more than two kids seems more significant in the present days. Such stereotypic assumptions are comparatively more in the Christian community. I say this solely based on my knowledge and calculation. The community will forever remain a minority in number, as the desire to have few children has become the eleventh commandment of Christianity.

Taking into consideration the present lifestyle across the country, I have learnt that the attitude to have a small family is endlessly generalized, and the individual differences are neither accepted nor respected. Also, the joy in having more children is completely missing due to this approach of the society.

Ironically, the desire to have more children is comparatively less among the well-to-do than among the poor. It should have been vice-versa, as the rich have greater ability to provide better prospects to the children.

On the other hand, today, having more than two children seems to be a ‘mistake’ or ‘irresistibility’ of the couples. It is certainly not, it is of the course love factor that is dominating the atmosphere.

More important is the psychological trauma that the only child of a parent goes through. In a nuclear family with no companion to share or play with, there is every chance of loneliness creeping in. Siblings are not only the best playmates, but as years go by, they become each other's confidants, advisors, and true companions for life. In the absence of a sibling, there is only the outer world to depend upon for companionship.

Intending no harm to the agenda of the Ministry of Health and Family Welfare, I would say that a big family is always more fun and the noise is pleasant. Small families even though they  have some merits in themselves, in the long run, the caring and sharing attitude decreases day by day.

As American actor Trey Parker said, "I think people that have a brother or sister don't realize how lucky they are. Sure, they fight a lot, but to know that there's always somebody there, somebody that's family."

Naveen Menezes Archives:

• Poem : Footsteps 
• My Fantasy